In the beginning
I had big dreams for myself. Grow up, marry a handsome man, raise 3 children in a beautiful home. Maybe have a dog for aesthetic purposes. Travel around the world. Throw in some friends. And we have the perfect receipt for life.And then I grew up.
Although I have to say, I did get that handsome man and did live the fairy tale dream...just not the one I thought I'd get. I married a Marine. Strong and handsome with a smart ass mouth. I wish I could live this next part over again. Over and over.
We had a whirlwind romance. There's nothing more romantic than having a man's man head over heels for YOU! He was a keeper. I gave him hell. I tried to break up with him 3 times....for no real reason. Mainly, he was a marine and I didn't have anything else to do. I told him he had to surprise me for Valentine's Day. That kidnapping me and taking me to a weekend romantic getaway would be appropriate. In fact, I just went ahead and took two days off from work. And he did. How a marine has time and money to take their girlfriend to a romantic New York cabin for the weekend is beyond me. Apparently, that was the weekend he realized he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Meanwhile, I was feeling guilty that weekend because I didn't want to waste this guy's time.
But his love won me over. We fell madly in love. Less than a year later, he snuck off to my house in Maryland and asked me to marry him. Three days later we wed. Three weeks later he stepped onto Afghanistan soil.
Deployment. The worse time of my life. To go months without hearing from him. Feeling his touch. To hear his voice. He sent me the best letters of my life. When I opened them up dirt from Afghanistan fell out. I had to blow the dust off. I was so happy to get word from him, I didn't care about dirt all over my bedspread. I found out later Afghanistan has anthrax in their dirt. Maybe I should've been concerned... He would tell me silly stories to keep me entertained. Mostly they were love letters and dreams about our future.
I had left my career behind and moved to Camp Lejeune, NC for the last month or two of deployment. I didn't know exactly which month he was coming home but I sure wasn't going to miss it!
I loved being a Marine wife. I never thought I would love the military so much but I do. And I always will. It's a hard life but worth it. I grew up so fast. I was faced with so many different things. I love the community. It doesn't matter if I've never met you, if you're military we're family. I'd do anything for you. Don't get me wrong, there are crazies out there. I tended to avoid those for obvious reasons. The wives. I miss the wives. When you go through a traumatic and emotional event you can't help but become close to those going through it with you. They were more than my support system. These strangers became my best friends. I could laugh and cry with them. There wasn't judgment. Maybe concern because we'd monitor each other. It was always out of love and understanding.
And then there was the Marine Corps itself. They took care of me. I had a family readiness officer who I could call up at any time. He even helped me with my job. He would let me know of all the different opportunities I could take advantage of. I always felt comforted that I could call him if I needed anything. Even when I was living in another state they were still available for me. If something happened to me I knew my family readiness officer would send help. It really gave me comfort and made me love the military. I wanted to stay in for 20 years because of my experience during deployment.
The worse thing about deployment was the doorbell. It rung three times while he was gone. The doorbell means your husband is dead. That's the only news they tell you in person. When the bell would ring, I would grow very still and just pretend it didn't happen. I would wait for someone else to answer it. One time, I got the nerve to do it myself. When I found out it wasn't the chaplain I would breathe but would curse that bell.
Finally, the day came. Homecoming. June 4, 2009 the love of my life marched back into my life. He made it home alive. Not everyone did. It was so perfect when he came home. We were so happy together. Life was great. I wanted to stay in the military forever. Re-enlist and move to some exotic and new place. I love the adventure but all the security with the Military. Unless you break the law, you're going to have a job. I wanted to start a family with him. Little Marine babies, which of course he'd balk at that term.
It wasn't the fairy tale I thought I'd get. It was better. I didn't get the wimpy prince. I got the Marine. Of course, its the Marine that would make fun of that Prince but he's my Marine. And I love him.
But then, it was over. He decided to try his hand at being a civilian. He was a successful Marine who had done great things. He would go into the civilian world and do even better. But it didn't turn out that way.
This is my blog. Life after the military. I went from a whirlwind romance to a whirlwind life. Relearning the civilian life. I was always a civilian but somehow I forgot how to be. I learned a better way of life. We moved across the country to a state where we don't have any connections. We were homeless and jobless. Its been a tough road. This is the purpose of my blog. Trying to figure this out.
.jpg)
0 comments:
Post a Comment